Dear Sonshine

Dear Sonshine Academy, 

Last week our 5 year old daughter graduated from you. Today is her last day to be a student with you. She is no longer a Pre-K'er.

(Sidenote: Whoa.)

Yes, our oldest daughter is growing up and let me tell you, we're not sad about this at all. Nope. Not at all. Not in the least. And if you believe this, I also have some ocean front property in Arizona you might be interested in.

Norah was thrilled about this picture too. Promise. 

It feels like the time she spent with you guys zoomed by at light speed. I mean just absolutely flew. The craziest part of it all: Maddie was only a student there one full school year, even though it feels like it was so very much longer. But man, the growing up that we all did during that school year there was unreal. The tender care you guys gave to not just Maddie but both our daughters, and the encouragement and support all the time is something we will never forget.

We came to you guys last August a little worried, a little apprehensive, a little tentative considering some of the issues we had been through with the last school Maddie attended. But all those fears quickly subsided and the amount of growth and progress she's shown in the year we spent with you frankly brings tears to our eyes. 

We know there were plenty of times along the way where things maybe seemed like a bit much for her to handle and Maddie decided she'd rather sit this one out. Animals she didn't want to pet or see. Big noisy firetrucks. And yeah, maybe she was the only one who didn't want to wear her mortarboard during graduation last week. But you guys never forced her to do something she didn't want and loved on her anyway. For the awesome little kid that she is. And we can't tell you how much that means to us.

So thanks to you, Sonshine Academy. Thank you, Mrs. Nan. For reasons we don't understand and probably never will, but the compassion you've shown Maddie has been a game changer. Thank you Sarah and Carolyn, for all your hard work this school year and the gospel-centered love you've shown to our big kid.

Thank you for causing two parents with so many anxieties about a 5-year old like ours to be able to breathe a little bit, if only for five hours a day.

Please know you will always have a special place with us. Always.

That's The Way Potty Training Go

Say, is that my old pal John? 

Yes.

Well I'll be! How ya doin' old chap? 

Good.

How was your Christmas? Did you have a nice holiday? 

Yep.

Whaddya think about this weather? Been a pretty mild winter so far, dontcha think?

Um, yep.

So what's new? Read any good books lately? 

Stop it.

How about this election? Trump or Cruz? Bernie Sanders and Hilary? Boy, oh boy!

I said, stop.

So by now you're probably wondering, "Hey John, where ya been all this time?" Well the short answer to that is life. Life is where we've been. I still work odd hours, Mel has her hours at the salon, and when we're not parenting and our house is actually quiet it's nice to just plop down on the couch and forget about everything, let alone updating a blog. Maybe watch a little Netflix. Right now, we're on Mad Men. Did you know there were 3,000,000,000 people in the world in 1960 and according to this show approximately 2,995,000,000 of them smoked. That's the highlight I've taken out of this show so far.

Anyway, I digress.

Recently, we had decided it was time to start potty training with Maddie. We'd been receiving reports that she's been staying pretty dry in her diapers at school throughout most of the day, and after doing research on a particular method which involves a hardcore three-day regiment of strict potty training - we decided to give it a shot. This was not without its trials right from the get-go, however, as Maddie was dealt a pretty nasty case of pink eye and an equally annoying yet somewhat less unsightly ear infection at the same time. Turned out it wasn't really that much of a factor as far as effectiveness for the potty training aspect of it goes, but boy there were times when we had to tread lightly and struggle to keep disease from spreading around like wildfire.

Let's begin.

Day 1: Much of what we've read said in the first day of this three day period you should expect a lot of accidents. In anticipation of this, we loaded the house down with cleaning supplies, wipes, paper towels, and also Lysol to avoid any outbreaks of the aforementioned pink eye malady. We had potty seats on both toilets, upstairs and downstairs, and a portable seat in case of a sneak attack bladder evacuation while watching television or while we were outside. Mel also came prepared, and we were fully stocked with at least 20 pairs of panties stocked and ready to go.

We got Maddie up and started the day with her as we would any other, but made a bigger deal this time around when we took off her diaper and put on some big girl panties instead. I think there was even a ceremonial reading of this book, which has quickly skyrocketed to the top of her own personal Amazon Best Seller list. We then sat her on the toilet and gave her specific instructions to let Mommy or Daddy know when she had to go potty. I don't remember if she went or not that first time, but it was a bit of a struggle getting her to do so as you would imagine.

The first success of the day occurred later in the afternoon after I had left for work. It came complete with letting Mel know a pee was about to happen, escorting her to the bathroom, and doing the deed on the potty (followed by a token of our appreciation for being a big girl and doing a good job - one Nutter Butter). I wasn't around but I'm pretty sure there were trumpets and at least one verse of the Hallelujah Chorus that broke out.

Day 2: The day, as I recall, went mostly smooth. We did have a few accidents - one of which involved me stepping out of the room to get something leaving a dry Maddie by herself with some toys for a moment, and then returning to said room only to find a Lake Michigan of urine forming on the floor.

Still, it did start to noticeably get better as the day went on. Even though Maddie was still trying to get the hang of letting us know when she needed to go before it got too late, when we did stick her on the toilet it was beginning to flow a lot smoother than it had the day before.

(Editors note: Stop. No more potty jokes.)

Day 3: By day number three, a Sunday, we were a lot less apprehensive about Maddie sans diaper. To reward her for the hard work she had put in up to this point, and because it was practically 90 degrees in January, we let her run around with the hose in the backyard in her bathing suit. We still instructed her to tell us when she needed to go, but obviously weren't as concerned about it if she did.

I think we may have still had at least one accident this day, but by this point it was just one of those things. It wasn't until a week later that Maddie had her first accident of the #2 variety, and it was a messy one. Gotta crack a few eggs to make an omelet, and all that good stuff.

And so, here we are 3.5 weeks later or so, feeling pretty good about things. Maddie's gotten much better about telling us when she needs to go, although we still remind her all the time to let us (or Yiayia, or Oma, or her teacher, or someone of some level of authority who is or will be watching over her) know when she needs to use the potty.

Conclusion: The three day method of potty training definitely seems to have done its charm. I don't know how many other rigorous, clandestine methods of training there are for this sort of thing but if there are any parents who have yet to cross this bridge in the life of their child and are looking for suggestions of things to try and help them along (sidenote: You're a fool. I would feed my child cereal every day if I could. Why are you reading one of my blog posts. Go look at something else my wife posted and stuff.) I'll post the links to the references we used below.

“It’s been said that adults spend the first two years of their children’s lives trying to make them walk and talk, and the next sixteen years trying to get them to sit down and shut up. It’s the same way with potty training: Most adults spend the first few years of a child’s life cheerfully discussing pee and poopies, and how important it is to learn to put your pee-pee and poo-poo in the potty like big people do. 

But once children have mastered the art of toilet training, they are immediately forbidden to ever talk about poop, pee, toilets and other bathroom-related subjects again. Such things are now considered rude and vulgar, and are no longer rewarded with praise and cookies and juice boxes. 

One day you’re a superstar because you pooped in the toilet like a big boy, and the next day you’re sitting in the principal’s office because you said the word “poopy” in American History class (which, if you ask me, is the perfect place to say that word).” 

― Dav Pilkey, Captain Underpants And The Preposterous Plight Of The Purple Potty People

Hopping The Potty Train: The 3 Day Method / PB&J Babes Link
How To Potty Train Your Toddler In Three Days / Project Potty Training Link

February Update

(Editor's note: This blog post has intentionally been written in a question and answer format.)

Hey John! Sure is swell to hear from you again! What are you up to? 
I'm blogging.

That sure sounds neat! Whatcha gonna talk about?
Stuff.

Man, sounds awesome! Can't wait to hear more about it!

Well, for starters I'm working new hours now. Not to get into any details, but the industry I work in currently is experiencing some not so good times right now. But when one door closes, as the saying goes, another one opens. This particular door opened to a new opportunity in a different department doing some different stuff during what I guess you could classify as "off-shift" hours. Vague enough for you? Good.

It's been an adjustment, and leaving to go to work in the afternoon has become increasingly difficult for me knowing that after I leave I won't get to see Maddie again until the following morning (although we do FaceTime every night while I'm eating dinner at work). But I really love being home in the mornings and so does Mel. I've even gotten to take her to school this week, which freaked her teacher out a little bit ("is everything alright with Melissa???" Yes yes, she's fine.)

And I know what you're thinking: What about the Rangers? How will you watch the games? Well, the short answer is I probably won't. Unless it's Saturday, Sunday, or a west coast start time. But in case you had forgotten, things are very rapidly going to become quite busy around the old plantation soon. Hey, that sounds like a nice segue-way into my next subject. Next question, please.

That's our second daughter's face, partially blocked by her arm, by the way.

So I guess that little bundle of joy should be a-comin soon! Hope you guys are ready! 

That wasn't really a question.

Hard to believe that yes, in about one month's time we will become a family of four. It feels like things have flown by this time around. It went by fast with Maddie, but that didn't really happen until the first of the year, and then it zoomed by right up until the day she was born in April. With Norah, this has been at warp speed pretty much from the day Mel found out she was pregnant again.

How are we doing? I guess we're good to go. Maybe a little stressed. Okay, I'M maybe a little stressed. As you can imagine, the work situation hasn't helped matters much. Mel is too busy planning things and looking for headbands to go with a dress for newborn pictures and making meals to stick in the freezer and deciding that Maddie's big girl bed doesn't look awesome against this wall and needs to be against that wall instead to be stressed.

Among the things we're looking forward to in all this, we're both very intrigued to see what similarities and differences there are between Norah and her big sister (man, that sounds weird). Is she going to have the same personality as Maddie, who loves to laugh at everything? Are they going to be exact opposites? Is she going to be a horrible sleeper, unlike her sister who can go Rip Van Winkle on you pretty well?

Is Norah going to pass her first hearing test, and not have to endure everything her sister is going through? We just don't know. We're anxious to find out all of these things, and to love our second little girl to the ends of the earth and back, just as we do our first.

Say, how's that little ball of energy Madeline doing? I bet she's cookin' up some trouble right now! 

Well since it's 12:03 AM as I am writing this, no she is not. But Maddie is not really a ball of energy, oh no. I wouldn't call her that at all. Perhaps something more accurate, like what about: A spherical shaped object of massive amounts of propulsion. She's ALWAYS going. She's pretty much everything we want and need in a child. She keeps us on our toes, she makes us laugh, makes us cry a lot too, and makes us both realize the kind of parents that we want to be: Supportive, caring, not over-bearing, and always there for our children whenever they need us.

Maddie has been wearing hearing aids for five months now. They are in from the time she gets up in the morning until she goes down for a midday nap, and then are back in her ears when she gets up until she goes to sleep for the evening. We've changed battery types and can now get about 4-5 days worth of juice out of them, depending on how often they're being used, and we also still have to watch out for the occasional wandering toddler fingers to pull one out an ear and insert it into her mouth because it looks like it might be fun to chew on.

She's also been in speech therapy for five and a half months, and this is the most important part of it all.

Having a child with a disability like we do with Maddie, it's real easy to put up a force field around them and yourself and tell everyone else around you that she's just like all the other kids. That part of it is true - Maddie is just like all the other kids. She loves to play with the dogs, loves the swings at the park, loves to read, loves to kick her Frozen ball around the house, loves playing in the dirt.......all of that. As Mel talked about in her last blog, she was made in the image of God just like the rest of us were. He knew what He was doing when he made her, just as He did with everybody else. It's just that Maddie's ears don't work quite as normally as the rest of the kids around her do.

Now with all that being said, yesterday at speech therapy might have been one of, if not the best 45 she's had there. I mean, Maddie was responding to everything just like she should. She was repeating things, responding the way she should to everything and it was wonderful to see. She's come so far from the first therapy session where it was more or less just getting Maddie to turn and look at you when we made a syllable sound.

A few weeks ago, seemingly out of the blue, Maddie said the word "baseball" to us while we were playing outside. It was like nothing we had ever heard before: Clear as day, almost perfect consonants and vowels...it was awesome. She had said other things up to that point too, your Mamas, Daddies, doggies, etc. But to us, when she said that it was a clear indication that everything we're doing, the hearing aids, the therapy, the sitting next to her at the dinner table making animal and transportation noises - it's working, it's all working. No doubt there's still going to be tough days for her and us. We worry almost daily if she's screaming and not cooperating because she's regressing or just being a toddler. But man, it was awesome.

In my head, I keep playing over scenarios of when she's older and in school and having to deal with questions from other kids about why she has to wear those things in her ears all the time. Maybe she won't know what to tell them, maybe she'll get upset and sad and come home crying to us wanting to know why she has have them. Or further down the road than that, and how they might affect whether or not she'll be good at sports. Or even further down the road than that, when she meets a boy and what his reaction will be when she explains going on with her ears to him? The time will come to address things like that, but not just yet because she's still just a kid. A kid who's about to become a big sister. Man, still sounds weird.

Wow John, that was really sweet! Really tugged at the ol' heart strings!

Please stop.

Ok, sorry.

Madeline's nursery

Whew.... What a freakin relief to have her nursery "done."  Everything had been hung and up for a couple of weeks, but I still had so many piles of stuff everywhere while I was procrastinating on figuring out how I wanted everything organized.  But today, one giant exhale.  It's done.  All of her clothes are washed, everything is put away, and the closet is actually relatively neat (although no photographic evidence.)

I envisioned the nursery to be shabby chic and girly without it being pink throw up.  (This is when I mention, so if baby # 2, (whenever that may be) is a boy, I can make some minor changes and have it work.  This is when John says "can we please get through Baby #1 before you start talking about #2??")  It really turned out as good, if not better than I had imagined.

Furniture: God bless Canton. The dresser and wardrobe were a steal.  Not to mention the wardrobe allows me to have so much more space available in the closet.  The swivel rocking chair was a $30 craigslist find.  I had originally planned on having it recovered, but like having one pop of pink in the room, and again - I can always change my mind and have it recovered later.  The side table was also a craigslist treasure--a table that is actually still sold at PB Kids, for 3x what we paid for it.  The crib - credits go to Yiayia and Papou for that.  Love the vintage Jenny Lind style, it's a perfect fit in the room.

Accessories: God bless Pinterest. I hacked the Shel Silverstein gallery from someone - thank you.  The curtains add just the right touch - thanks Oma and Opa!  The metal "M" - again, score 1 for Canton.  The big white frames with fabric - thank you random Pinterest-er.  The mobile and lampshade - product of a Pinterest-y crafty morning with Oma and Aunt Sally.  The crib bedding was definitely a custom splurge, but justified by the awesome deals we got on everything else, I didn't lose too much sleep over it :)

There are lots of thanks, but the 4 most important:
Barbs: Thank you for your handiness.  Thank you for coming over with your toolkits (yes, people, she has multiple), drilling and helping me make sure everything is level.  The room would definitely not be as precise without you.
Kiley & Sally:  Thank you for putting up with my 5 bajillion texts asking for advice.  I promise at some point, I will be able to make a decision without y'all's input.
John:  Thank you for (within reason) letting me have free reign.  And for pretending to care when I asked for your input.  I love you.

my attempt at the panoramic shot